How to Survive and Thrive After a Divorce

When you’ve reached that point where you’re backed into a corner, where nothing you say or do changes anything, and you’re left feeling unheard, exhausted, or even betrayed, it's time to get honest with yourself. Ask the hard question: if I stay, will I truly be happy? Will anything change? Or if I leave, could this finally be the start of something better, something just for me?

Here’s what you must understand: staying just because it feels “safe” or because of the kids is not the answer. Staying in a place where you’re not respected or loved the way you deserve isn’t safety;

it’s slow emotional erosion. And all you’re doing by staying is kicking the can down the road. Eventually, the same pain will resurface, sometimes stronger, sometimes louder.

No one — and I mean no one— should be trapped in an unhappy relationship. If your partner isn’t willing to meet you halfway and put the work in, then you already have your answer. It’s time to call it. Divorce isn’t failure; it's a declaration that your soul deserves peace, purpose, and love — even if that means starting from scratch.

Yes, starting over is terrifying. But you can make it easier by taking control of what you can. Lean on your friends. Say yes to new hobbies. Blow the dust off that passport and book the damn trip. There are grief retreats and healing holidays just like ours Mending Hearts Retreat made exactly for this season of your life — yoga by the sea, meditative hikes in the mountains, or just silent peace in a sun-soaked villa where no one knows your story unless you choose to tell it. These are not just escapes — they are stepping stones to your rebirth.

You have to rebuild — but this time, it’s on your terms. No compromising, no pretending, no hiding. You get to decide who you are now and what your next chapter looks like.

As a child of divorced parents, I can tell you first-hand: staying together “for the kids” can cause more damage than walking away ever could. Living in a toxic house where love and respect were long gone hurt me in ways I didn’t fully understand until I was older. It got so bad I left home at 16 — not out of rebellion, but because I was desperate for peace. I wanted freedom from the shouting, the silence, the hate. I needed a new beginning, even if it meant being on my own.

Having kids with someone is not enough reason to stay if you’ve stopped growing together. In fact, it’s all the more reason to show your kids what self-respect and healthy love look like. Step into your next chapter with intention. Prioritise you, your goals, your healing, your happiness. You’ve spent enough time accommodating someone else’s version of happiness. Now it’s your turn.

And while you’re stepping away, remember this: no matter how angry or hurt you feel, don’t badmouth your ex in front of the children. Your kids are not weapons. They’re watching everything, your grace, your composure, your choices. How you handle this heartbreak will stay with them for life. Teach them dignity, not drama.

Keep your head high. Don't get dragged into the mud. Keep communication minimal and focused solely on your children's well-being. If you can't speak without it turning into a shouting match, move the conversation to email. Boundaries are your new best friend.

And finally, please don’t waste your energy on revenge. It’s just another leash tying you to someone you’re trying to walk away from. The best revenge is healing. Go live your life. Reclaim your life. Stop waiting for closure and be your own closure.

This isn’t the end, it’s the beginning of your comeback. You are not broken. You are breaking free.

Our next retreat will be hosted at Villa El Goute, Marrakech, Morocco 30 September - 06 October 2025

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